Yes, it’s that time again – so who’s thinking of making a New Year’s
resolution?
A New Year’s resolution is creating an expectation – and expectations can make us hostages to disappointment (please see the item from earlier this year How Can We Manage Expectations?). Of course, resolutions can be a source of fun for the New Year, but many of us make them, and we mean business. But do we really need that kind of pressure? So many of us are setting ourselves up for a fall.
A resolution hangs over us like CCTV with teeth, and it is going to hurt because the majority of us will not fulfil those contracts so fervently undertaken at the beginning of January. The main problem is that we often find ourselves adhering to an agenda set by the marketing/media colossus the sole aim of which is to shame us into investing in something to make us into someone else, and they are very good at it.
So, is there a lasting alternative to the New Year ‘stick up’?
How about this year making a ‘New Day’s Resolution’? I am talking about a small change, or small changes, every day. No whistles and bells required; no dramatic gestures; no unrealistic promises to break. Small steps towards a larger goal that has to be realistic, challenging, and mid term (3-6 months max).
To help maintain the small daily resolutions, keep in mind some classic, almost unfashionable, factors that need to be in place:
PATIENCE
It’s almost a dirty word nowadays, but harness it’s potential and you can be unstoppable. The ancient Chinese philosopher, Lao Tzu is attributed as saying ‘A journey of a thousand miles begins with one step’. A personal development journey is no different and begins and continues one step at a time.
MOMENTUM
Do not let up. This does not mean setting off like a bull out of a gate – it is about setting your own pace for change & then not stopping for anything or anyone.
ACCEPTANCE
A vital element in building a non-judgmental today is learning to accept that what has happened up to this moment has already happened: it's gone and there is nothing we can do about yesterday. Anything other than acceptance is futile and a distraction. The crucial thing is that what happens next is entirely up to you. That is, no guilt or personal recrimination for the current situation, just acceptance and, at the same instance, the realisation that life change can begin this instant.
The decision to make a real lasting change in your life is the first very important step. Understanding that real and lasting development can begin right now, one step at a time - measured, gradual, but at the same time focused and relentless – this season it is a great gift we can give ourselves.
All it takes is one step ....... so, fancy going for a walk?
A New Year’s resolution is creating an expectation – and expectations can make us hostages to disappointment (please see the item from earlier this year How Can We Manage Expectations?). Of course, resolutions can be a source of fun for the New Year, but many of us make them, and we mean business. But do we really need that kind of pressure? So many of us are setting ourselves up for a fall.
A resolution hangs over us like CCTV with teeth, and it is going to hurt because the majority of us will not fulfil those contracts so fervently undertaken at the beginning of January. The main problem is that we often find ourselves adhering to an agenda set by the marketing/media colossus the sole aim of which is to shame us into investing in something to make us into someone else, and they are very good at it.
So, is there a lasting alternative to the New Year ‘stick up’?
How about this year making a ‘New Day’s Resolution’? I am talking about a small change, or small changes, every day. No whistles and bells required; no dramatic gestures; no unrealistic promises to break. Small steps towards a larger goal that has to be realistic, challenging, and mid term (3-6 months max).
To help maintain the small daily resolutions, keep in mind some classic, almost unfashionable, factors that need to be in place:
PATIENCE
It’s almost a dirty word nowadays, but harness it’s potential and you can be unstoppable. The ancient Chinese philosopher, Lao Tzu is attributed as saying ‘A journey of a thousand miles begins with one step’. A personal development journey is no different and begins and continues one step at a time.
MOMENTUM
Do not let up. This does not mean setting off like a bull out of a gate – it is about setting your own pace for change & then not stopping for anything or anyone.
ACCEPTANCE
A vital element in building a non-judgmental today is learning to accept that what has happened up to this moment has already happened: it's gone and there is nothing we can do about yesterday. Anything other than acceptance is futile and a distraction. The crucial thing is that what happens next is entirely up to you. That is, no guilt or personal recrimination for the current situation, just acceptance and, at the same instance, the realisation that life change can begin this instant.
PLAN IT
Real lasting
change, and that’s what we’re talking about with a resolution, it a serious
business – so it needs to be planned. Once planned, it needs to be backed up a
commitment to see it through. The decision to make a real lasting change in your life is the first very important step. Understanding that real and lasting development can begin right now, one step at a time - measured, gradual, but at the same time focused and relentless – this season it is a great gift we can give ourselves.
All it takes is one step ....... so, fancy going for a walk?
Alan Keyse is a fully qualified Business and Life Coach who now applies his 30 years of experience as a sales executive to coaching Emotional Intelligence to business leaders, executives, managers and their staff either in one-to-one sessions, in groups, or speaking to larger audiences.
Alan Keyse
