Sunday 13 May 2012

ABOLISHING NEGATIVE CRITICISM: THE BENEFITS



I believe that our greatest resource is our mental energy. As powerful as this can be, however, it can be seriously undermined if we allow ourselves to slip into patterns of negative thinking. 

One of the most common forms of this is indulging in the negative criticism of others be it in our private lives or at work. This is not to be confused with the positive feedback essential to correct or improve performance in the workplace or behaviour at home. 


WE ARE DIMINISHED BY THIS NEGATIVITY
  1. The inbuilt negativity that comes with criticism is not conducive to building a positive environment within which to live and work. So often we can hardly realize we are doing it at all and in this way negativity seeps into our lives almost undetected.
  2. If we criticize then we are judging from a self appointed position of superiority. This is not constructive either for ourselves or those on the receiving end. Of course once we have so judged someone then, of course, comes the sentence as well.
  3. If we waste our time (aka our life) concerning ourselves with the deficiencies of others, we can be distracted from dealing with the challenges facing us and our own issues can go unaddressed.
  4. Very often we may snipe at others because we are being defensive about something troubling us, therefore, we are building ourselves up by dismantling someone else.
  5. From a more profound perspective criticism of this kind actually diminishes us and saps our mental energy although we may never even realize this is happening

WHAT CAN WE DO ABOUT IT?
  1. The act of criticizing others exposes a weakness in ourselves so if we can identify what it is, it gives a good indicator of what we need to be dealing with. In any environment, identifying a weakness is the first step in the process of building strength.  
  2. One of the inherent weaknesses of negative thinking is that it dos not thrive under scrutiny. The important thing is to realize such thoughts are there in the first place. Once identified we can do something about them by calmly and quietly observing the thoughts, the emotions, the physical sensations associated with such negativity.
  3. It is important that this observation does not become self-criticism which is just as negative and unhelpful as criticizing others. Observation is a positive act designed to address issues we face and put us in far greater control of our own thought process.
  4. Once negative thinking is weakened, positivity, and constructive ideas can take over the space we have created. Instead of criticism there will be understanding and the more we understand others, the better placed we are to influence our relationships for the good.
  
Of course, in business and our private lives we need to make judgments constantly, however, if we are able to replace negative emotions with reason and understanding it can only enhance our clarity of thought, how were select our choices and our decision making. It has taken decades of conditioning to fashion the way we think. Like any skill, observing and taking control of ones thinking can be learnt with practice, vigilance and patience.  

Ultimately this is all about reclaiming control of our thought process by clearing away negativity and useless unproductive thinking. In this way we can concentrate on improving ourselves, influencing for the good the space around us, and to the benefit of family, friends, and colleagues alike.

Alan Keyse
www.keysforliving.org
info@keysforliving.org